I’ve reworked this piece and do not know which version I prefer…. so I’ve put them both here. I thought it would be fun to talk about a bit.
a cup of bitter tea
how we warm up to sadness comforted by aching so familiar that deep empty longing uncertainty seems more risky than heartache so we stay with what we know the familiar taste of our own sorrow
more bitter tea to drink
Funny how we can warm up to the sadness Feel comforted by aching, Familiar with deep empty longing so fearful of leaving what we know that uncertainty seems more terrifying, we stay with what is know the familiar taste of our own sorrow
I think the same feeling and message is captured in each version, the idea of staying in a place that causes you sorrow for fear of the unknown. I get caught in this thing where I try and condense my pieces down to micro poems. Those short word daggers that pierce right into our souls making us feel so much. I struggle with when to stop cutting out words…. where is the best place to stop trimming? I think it can be a little like when you trim your own bangs, there is like a millimeter between amazing and bad bangs 😉
So I offer it up to you dear reader…. which do you prefer?
How do you re-work your words?
Is this one of your struggles as a writer, what else do you bite your nails over?
